marriage before baby?

September 15th, 2008 at 2:22 PM

Don't get married just because of the baby.
Raising a kid will be stressful enough, you don't need the stress of a failing marriage as well.
You JUST moved in together, you barely know each others living styles and routines yet.

Trust me, it will all go downhill once you get comfortable.

September 15th, 2008 at 2:44 PM

If you are already pregnant, you don't need to think about marriage. That's just more stress. Being married isn't something that you should have to think about, if you wanna be with someone for the rest of your life there shouldn't be any doubt... so just wait until you're positive. Don't fall under the pressure.

As for the baby thing, it's kind of too late for me to put my judgement on that.
If you're happy with it. Kudos.

Just saying, it's not going to be easy in the long run.

September 15th, 2008 at 3:52 PM

I think I'm just being ign'ant but what's the big deal about being married? You guys are living and having a child together - why the fuck not?

September 15th, 2008 at 4:11 PM

Originally posted by fairy

I think I'm just being ign'ant but what's the big deal about being married? You guys are living and having a child together - why the fuck not?

September 15th, 2008 at 4:45 PM

Actually, you might wanna get married...
Cause if not, he'll have to pay child support!

September 15th, 2008 at 5:10 PM

Originally posted by mafia

Actually, you might wanna get married...
Cause if not, he'll have to pay child support!

September 15th, 2008 at 5:12 PM

wtf are you talking about? if she tries to get on welfare, or any kind of state assistance...yes.

September 15th, 2008 at 5:13 PM

That's not how it is here in AZ or in WA.
My mom was on State Assistance and for all my life in bother WA and AZ my dad NEVER once got slammed with child support payments.,
IF they are living together, that just wouldn't make sense, now would it?

September 15th, 2008 at 5:17 PM

Why are we assuming that they will require assistance? o.O

September 15th, 2008 at 5:33 PM

Since you're already knocked up, I don't think there's any point and rushing the marriage. It'll probably not work out and you'll have a kid with divorced parents.

I personally will not have a kid unless I'm married, or if it's an accident and I am capable of taking care of it. I want to get married and be married for quite a bit before I think of babies.

September 16th, 2008 at 8:56 AM

Yeah thanks guys! we definately arent rushing into marriage but we might stay engaged for a few years. we would get married but like someone said, i dont wanna get married just because im having a baby. but thanks again:]

September 16th, 2008 at 12:53 PM

My point was that a baby takes a lot more responsibility and commitment than marriage does, you're creating another life and you have to guide the child and care for it in a way you can't even imagine yet.
If you're doing all that before thinking of marriage then maybe you're not ready at all.

September 16th, 2008 at 1:51 PM

Originally posted by Tempest

My point was that a baby takes a lot more responsibility and commitment than marriage does, you're creating another life and you have to guide the child and care for it in a way you can't even imagine yet.
If you're doing all that before thinking of marriage then maybe you're not ready at all.

September 17th, 2008 at 12:38 AM

Originally posted by Tempest

Get married before you even THINK about having a baby. That's the way it should be.
Don't have an abortion but just like he said if you'e not ready to get married then you're definitely not ready to have a baby.
TRUE.
Follow my advice, it will help you in the long run.

September 17th, 2008 at 2:46 AM

Everyone is biased in some way.

September 17th, 2008 at 3:41 AM

Originally posted by Tempest

Get married before you even THINK about having a baby. That's the way it should be.
Don't have an abortion but just like he said if you'e not ready to get married then you're definitely not ready to have a baby.
TRUE.
Follow my advice, it will help you in the long run.

September 17th, 2008 at 3:46 AM

marriage is just a technicality

Age at marriage for those who divorce in America
Age Women Men
Under 20 years old 27.6% 11.7%
20 to 24 years old 36.6% 38.8%
25 to 29 years old 16.4% 22.3%
30 to 34 years old 8.5% 11.6%
35 to 39 years old 5.1% 6.5%

don't get married in your twenties, everybody's swingin

September 17th, 2008 at 4:22 AM

Originally posted by babynuts

Fuck that. If you're not ready for marriage, you're not ready for a baby. They both involve heavy commitment and a shitload of responsibility, compromising, and time.

Like I said... Have an abortion.

September 18th, 2008 at 2:10 AM

Originally posted by Scream

Originally posted by Tempest

Get married before you even THINK about having a baby. That's the way it should be.
Don't have an abortion but just like he said if you'e not ready to get married then you're definitely not ready to have a baby.
TRUE.
Follow my advice, it will help you in the long run.

Because they totally have a choice right?
Because the name of this thread is 'thinking of getting pregnant! Whatcha think?!'.
Sorry, but your explanation doesn't really contribute to the situation.

September 18th, 2008 at 2:14 AM

I was pregnant before I had a baby, but eventually did get married for the baby.
Now, I am going through a divorce.
And it's not really fair to our son.
Even though he IS only 5 months.
I don't hate his dad, I'm just not very fond of him.

JUST PLEASE MAKE SURE what ever you do choose, it's the best for everyone/everything.
You don't want an abusive husband, who's abusive to you and your child.
Nor do you want to get a divorce 2 months later.

Marriage is you and him saying, "i'll love you eternally". Make sure you do/will.

September 18th, 2008 at 2:49 AM

Originally posted by Tempest

Originally posted by Scream

Originally posted by Tempest

Get married before you even THINK about having a baby. That's the way it should be.
Don't have an abortion but just like he said if you'e not ready to get married then you're definitely not ready to have a baby.
TRUE.
Follow my advice, it will help you in the long run.

Because they totally have a choice right?
Because the name of this thread is 'thinking of getting pregnant! Whatcha think?!'.
Sorry, but your explanation doesn't really contribute to the situation.

UHHHHHH she's preggo already, they do have a choice. You're the one that doesn't really comprehend the thread, maybe read it again?
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL

September 18th, 2008 at 2:51 AM

you guys are both being dumb and not thoroughly reading each other's posts

September 18th, 2008 at 2:52 AM

THEY HAVE A CHOICE TO GET MARRIED BEFORE THE BABY COMESSS
jfc

September 18th, 2008 at 2:53 AM

I'm just confused on how she has an option to only think about having the baby before getting married. She already stated that she is having it.

Ester.
Fill me with knowledge.

September 18th, 2008 at 2:55 AM

Okay, you're right Esther.
She's pregnant, she's thinking of getting married, right?
What I'm saying is she should get married before the baby comes, it's not that hard to understand.